The enduring fascination with Catherine Cambridge's skirt

Never in the history of royal watching have we ever been so fascinated by another woman's skirt. Yes, we talk about the length and color of Catherine's clothes, marveling when the outfits sell out. We also discuss what we seen/don't see when said skirt get blown up in the wind. As was the case with Catherine as she stood with Prince William at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier at the war memorial in New Delhi.

*Clutches pearls*

Catherine's skirt has blown up! Let's write articles and dissect the moment. Let's keep a running tally while we're at it. Use it as another example of Catherine's seeming stubborn refusal to invest in wind defying skirts that are chic, affordable and stylish for the rest of us. Why can't she weigh her hems down? Is she an exhibitionist? Let's speculate on that too. Forget the purpose of the solemn moment or the visit in general. It all boils down to how Catherine looks and what she is wearing. That's a completely different article altogether.

Were it any other woman: mother, daughter, sister, close friend, co-worker, we would likely be sympathetic. It happens to the best of us at some point, no? We would not dare to make comments on a public forum when it comes to those closest to us. That would be inappropriate and bitchy. There is no way to positively spin shaming another woman. No way. There is nothing constructive about it, it does not add value and doing so will not lead to the greater good of women everywhere. As a matter of fact it will to the opposite.

So the next time another woman has a public wardrobe malfunction, show some respect. You will be grateful for that response when it happens to you.

© Marilyn Braun 2016

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Who is to blame for Kate's new bum rap?

Egads! Revealing photographs of Kate have been published - yet again!


In this case the photographs are from her recent tour of New Zealand/Australia showing her dress blown up by the wind showing her bottom in all its glory. This is not the first time her skirt has blown up revealing more than we needed to see, and I'm waging a guess that it won't be the last.


Now on to the crucial part: Who is to blame for all of this?


The royal watching twitterverse fired up with various explanations, scenarios, excuses, good reasons, bad reasons. The whole gamut of reactions covered. Bad article title puns (ahem), feminist rallying cries, heated exchanges and people unfollowed forever for expressing differing opinions! Stop the insanity! For the love of God it's a butt. WE ALL HAVE ONE!

So who gets the blame? Some blame the photographer - she shouldn't have taken such a prurient picture and then *gasp* sold it. Some blame the media, in this case, foreign publications which dared to publish those photos.

And most divisive of the arguments, some blamed Kate herself. As we have seen her skirt blow up before, the twitterverse offered commonsense tips for future reference: Kate should choose a different dress, put weights in the hems, wear longer skirts or trousers around helicopters.

However there was another side to those tweets blaming Kate. Some defended her, portraying her as the victim whose privacy had been invaded.  Other tweets had a disturbing 'she was asking for it,' tone. I don't think she is a victim but I don't think she helps herself in these situations either, especially when it has happened more than once. Regardless of what Kate was wearing, did those photos need to be taken? Did they need to be published? No. Is it a surprise that they were taken and published? Given the usual media coverage of Kate, no not really.

What is curious about this incident is people crying invasion of Kate's privacy. Not necessarily because of where she was, in a public place, performing royal duties. No, it was because we saw something we shouldn't have seen (If only we had looked away!)We all have a bottom but for some reason, Kate's is special and now in the public domain when it shouldn't be.

One party that seemed to be forgotten in the blame game. Us. Given how minutely her appearance is dissected, it is only natural that every aspect of her appearance would be seen as fair game. People who complain now that she is being objectified because of this appearance will be the same ones who objectify her over the color of her toe nails or a run in her pantyhose. Doing so feeds the interest and creates the demand for more. Even if it crosses a line we deem unacceptable.

I know where I place the blame for all of this. Do you?


© Marilyn Braun 2014
Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Dear Prince Harry, Please do something foolish again

I have a confession to make. In the last few months I've started to grow bored of the British Royal Family. For someone whose all consuming purpose in life (aside from eating and tending to my family) is to write commentary about royalty this is bad news. It is a new year and I have yet to get riled up enough to blog. I've been relegated to writing about how I am uninspired to write about royalty. What will the rest of 2014 be like?



It's off to a bad start. Recently Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge celebrated her 1,000th day as a member of the royal family. First of all, I find this number reassuring. It gives me proof that there are other people just as bored as I am. So bored they sat down and calculated how many days Catherine has been royal. It is also proof at how inane royal news has become. And it allows me to date-stamp the moment when royal news all started to go downhill.

You will find people who disagree with that statement. After all, isn't Catherine the best thing that has ever happened to the royal family in all the years of its existence? Isn't it wonderful that she is perfection personified that she has never, ever put a foot wrong? Catherine walks on water and everything she does turns to gold...


*Yawn*


I love writing critical commentary about this but right now I'm so bored I can't rouse myself to do so. I've run out of steam. Not enough to flounce skirts, gather up all my toys and melodramatically bid farewell in a blog post (sorry). But every time I read my twitter newsfeed, it slowly gets there. There's nothing controversial to write commentary about. Nothing new. No scandals to put into perspective. No sanctimonious denouncements about invading Kate's privacy by the very people who contribute to the problem. No royals getting naked or going on multiple exotic vacations. Even Prince Andrew (AKA Air Miles Andy) seems to be economizing. I used to follow various Kate fashion bloggers until my timeline was monopolized by a minute discussion about the actual color of Kate's shoes during her tour of Canada. Until that point I was completely indifferent. And this is why I'm date-stamping the downward spiral of royal news at April 29, 2011.


Before that date the coverage of Kate was much more interesting. Call it the thrill of the chase, the suspense, will they/won't they get married. The dynamic was different. The ridiculous stories were much more entertaining. Sure there was interest in outfits Kate wore, but it wasn't as obsessive as it is now. Now Kate has been relegated to a beautiful clothes horse and she seems happy to oblige. Great news for Kate fashion bloggers, but not so much for people looking for signs of substance behind it.


2013 was definitely a good year for royal news. The 60th anniversary of the coronation kept my Twitter feed dotted with tweets from grumpy republicans and smug monarchists responding to it. Surely there has to be a middle ground? Then there was Kate's pregnancy. Coverage that bordered on the ridiculous a majority of the time. But now that Kate has given birth to Prince George/Savior of the monarchy and he has been duly christened. Now what? Prince Charles shaking things up by merging PR offices. William, Harry and Catherine 'branding' themselves. Beatrice and Eugenie getting jobs. Lady Louise's successful eye surgery. William and Harry giving up playing with helicopters. Heck the most interesting "news story" is not about the royals, but about the outfit a transvestite wore to receive an honor from Prince Charles. Is this what we have to tide us over until Kate gets pregnant again or one of the royals dies?



I swear, where is a undercover reporter posing as a fake sheikh when you need one?



© Marilyn Braun 2014



Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Is Catherine a Duchess or a Princess? Kicking a dead horse is fun, but someone has to do it

It should have been simple and straightforward. Registering Prince George's birth. The first of many bureaucratic events he will have stay awake for later in life. His father Prince William, listed his occupation as  'Prince of the United Kingdom' on Prince George's birth registration. No one argued with that. It was listing Catherine's occupation as 'Princess of the United Kingdom' which got the 'drama' and 'mess' started.

Confusion abounded on twitter. Is she a princess or isn't she? At the time of the royal wedding the powers that be at the royal palace were insistent that Catherine was NOT a princess. Case closed, end of story. Personally, I accepted their word and got on with my life, even though deep in my heart of hearts a little voice told me they were wrong.

So the powers that be said Catherine isn't a princess. Certainly there was disappointment. Why wouldn't there be? Princess sounds so much more romantic than Duchess, doesn't it? Disney doesn't have a line of Disney Duchesses now do they? No little girl says 'I want to be a Duchess for Halloween'. Dammit! Catherine should be a princess. Women with 'Princess' fantasies suddenly had to switch gears to 'Duchess' fantasies instead. Oh the horror!

And then Prince George's birth registration came along, confusing everyone in the process. Had William elevated his wife to 'Princess of the United Kingdom' hoping the Queen, the fount of all honor, and other sharp eyed royal watchers wouldn't notice? Foolish Prince! How dare he go play polo at a time like this?

I admit it. I'm not above the fray. No one loves a good, meaningless royal discussion to distract me from the day to day hum-drum of my existence, more than I do. So I grabbed my popcorn. But after a day or so, when do we stop beating the dead horse? Facts are important, duly noted. But look, the poor horse is dead! Or did it wisely escape to greener pastures? Thankfully unable to read the twitter one-upmanship and royal reporters being beaten to death with dusty textbooks before starting an 'inquest' with their last breath. The Powers that be have 'mislead' the public for the last two years! Lies! Incompetence! The Republican movement nod their heads in agreement "See how we feel now?"

For the love of cheese and crackers, what is the world coming to when Buckingham Palace and Clarence House, the official of all official sites, can't even get this minor point, which has been blown out of all proportion, right?

Discuss amongst yourselves. I'm off to get some more popcorn.

© Marilyn Braun 2013

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Giving Catherine Cambridge a chance is hard, but someone has to do it

There are many ways in which Catherine cannot win.

• There's her dress sense. (Too long, too short, too safe, too expensive, too cheap, seen too often..)

• Then there's her looks. (She's too thin, Does she have extensions? what's with the sausage curls and hyena grin?)

• Not to mention questions about her marriage and 'commoner' family background (Catherine is nothing more than a social climber who duped William into marrying her..)

• Then there's her role within the royal family (Is she a senior royal or not? Her job is to give birth to an heir, why isn't she working more?)

• Comparisons to other royals (Is she the new Diana? Look at the Queen, 86 years old. What is Catherine's excuse?)

• As well as what she does in her spare time (Shopping, getting her hair done, vacations...)

• Then there is the media with their 'everything Catherine touches turns to gold articles'.  Their relentless focus on Catherine's appearance to the exclusion of everything else. Along with a complete inability to write an article that directly criticizes her. Even if that criticism is valid.

Recently Catherine has slowly increased her duties. Instead of hearing that she is doing things 'behind the scenes' we are actually seeing her carry out royal duties in public. It is something that many Kate critics have waited a long time for, myself included. But there's also cynicism. Will she increase her engagements or will she go on a luxury vacation after doing four of them? How can we know for sure? Will we be disappointed by her yet again?

That cynicism is very apparent in the aftermath of her royal duties. It is as if people can't make up their minds. Despite wanting her to do more engagements, when she does do one, people criticize the type of engagement (too frivolous, not serious enough). If the engagement is a serious one, people will find something else to criticize her for.  Case in point: Despite doing a great job during her visit to Child Bereavement UK,  people criticized the length of her hemline. Then there's the motive behind the engagement. Is it a genuine visit or just damage control?  St James's Palace's tendency to release engagement information on the heels of negative public opinion is suspicious. But is this can't always be the case, can it?

Given the amount of goodwill from the royal wedding, Catherine could have hit the ground running. But she didn't. There was a two year grace period filled with stops and starts and unpredictable engagements. Nothing consistent. Is it really any wonder that people are cynical about Catherine now?

It seems Catherine can't win regardless of what she does, it almost makes you wonder why she bothers to leave the house. But then people would probably complain about that too! Of course everyone is entitled to their opinion about Catherine. Having said that, there's a difference between criticizing her and putting her in an impossible situation by tearing her down no matter what she does.

Catherine has a fantastic platform to make a difference. With the increase in engagements, let's hope this is a sign she plans to do something with it.

© Marilyn Braun 2013

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Oh no, the sky is falling! Catherine Cambridge has been criticized yet again!

Seems Catherine Cambridge cannot cut a break after yet another older, accomplished woman has the temerity to express a two sentence critical opinion about Catherine Cambridge - Beloved, national treasure who has never put a foot wrong.

We will never know what Catherine thinks about radio host Sandi Toksvig opinion about her lack of opinion. (Whom Daily Mail has irrelevantly pointed out is middle-aged lesbian with three children). Much like we will never know what Catherine's thoughts are regarding Hilary Mantel's lecture. Of course Catherine cannot be expected to defend herself against everyone who dares to say something critical. It would be a full-time job and would make no difference whatsoever.

Some suggest that Catherine should emulate the Queen by becoming apolitical. Voicing no opinion for all these years has worked so successfully for the Queen, surely Catherine can follow suit? Look at the other royal women who don't offer opinions: Birgitte Gloucester, Princess Alexandra, Kate Kent. Quiet and under the radar, do they even exist? Nothing good can come from offering an opinion. Sophie Wessex learned this the hard way when she was stung by an undercover journalist in 2001. Then there was Princess Michael of Kent, also stung by the same journalist in 2005. Two cautionary tales. Don't worry, once they're dead, the authorized biography will reveal all.

Surely Catherine did not marry into the royal family to offer an opinion? That is not her purpose. It is to support her husband (read: don't overshadow him). Nothing wrong with wanting to support him but let's not forget the fact it would never occur to anyone to dare ask Prince William or Prince Harry to keep their thoughts to themselves.  Why is it different with Catherine?

Catherine expressing an opinion is a veritable minefield of danger. A line up of potential people just waiting to be offended. Catherine says she prefers Mondays, people who love Fridays will be up in arms. If Catherine says she prefers dogs the Daily Mail will scream: CATHERINE LIKES DOGS! HAMSTERS GO ON HUNGER STRIKE!

Opinions. From women. They only lead to trouble. After all, don't we already have too many successful, opinionated women in the world, already? Clearly, none of them should express their opinions either. For instance, Hilary Mantel.

When it comes to Catherine it seems that people interpret expressing her 'opinion' to mean becoming overly 'opinionated'. Once the floodgates open, there is no going back. Suddenly she would expound on everything like Prince Charles does. She would never be quiet, like she is supposed to be. The spell would be broken. Heaven forbid she become a role model for being a beautiful, well-dressed woman with an opinion!

*Gasp*

The horror...the horror...

© Marilyn Braun 2013

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

The Kate-Effect Hits The Alphabet

God I love the alphabet. So many letters to chose from. You can make up all kinds of words and stories and blog posts with them. This week, taking a page out of Sesame street, the royal world decided to focus on the letter 'D'.

For the last few days, the letter D has taken on a significance and prominence we could never have predicted. Prior to Tuesday, it was just the fourth letter of the alphabet. Used to spell words like decalogue and deinotherium. Kate's visit to Grimsby changed that.

During her visit to Grimsby, as Kate greeted crowds on her walkabout she was handed a teddy bear and a woman overheard her say "Oh, is this for our d ... " before stopping herself. The media replayed the video from the moment, listening to the audio for clues as to whether Kate had almost said 'daughter'. The verdict is still out on whether Kate actually said 'D' at all, but no matter. If hearsay is all we have to work with, well then so be it. The Kate effect had hit the alphabet and everyone was deliriously off and running.

A split second suddenly had the world on the edge of their seats. Did the letter D mean we had finally unlocked the secrets of the royal womb? Had Kate slipped up and revealed the sex of her baby? Could this much anticipated fetus/savior of the monarchy be...a daughter?

Calmer heads wisely recognized that there are other words that begin with the letter D. Could Kate have been taking the teddy bear for her d....driver?...dog?..dietitian?...doula?...detective?..dance instructor?...dermatologist?..designer? It became Sesame Street for royal watchers and toddlers as we rediscovered D words. Some even wondered if Kate was being devious to throw us off the scent.

With all of the media furor surrounding 'D' I will add another word to the list.

Desperate.

© Marilyn Braun 2013

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Catherine Cambridge is one step closer to sainthood

It's official. Since April 29th, 2011, Catherine Cambridge is the greatest person who has ever deigned to walk the earth amongst us.

We want her nose, clothes, hair, teeth and to get pregnant at the same time. Even her dog is better than yours. Don't believe me? Read this and weep at how inadequate we are in comparison. Thankfully she isn't a full time royal yet, so your work ethic is safe. Just don't get complacent.

Irrefutable proof of
our inadequacy

Everything Catherine touches turns to gold. No one goes shopping like she does. Or holds a cup of coffee with such je ne sais quoi.  she never spills and always recycles. She breathes with an élan that we can only breathlessly admire. When she gives birth, there will be no need to read the news. A star will be above the hospital guiding us to the blessed child, whose receiving blanket will sell out once he/she appears in it.

Catherine will be the perfect mother, or so we will be told. Never shall an impatient thought cross her mind. The child's diapers will be sweet. The contents capable of bringing world peace. Tied with Baby Jesus for halo size and awe inspiring serenity. He/She is already wealthier than you can ever dream of being. But this pales in comparison to having Catherine as the most perfect mother. Ever.

Yes. Catherine is the best person who ever lived. Or so we are told. When it comes to our opinions, there is no middle ground. Those who praise are sycophants, those who are critical are jealous. Only Catherine, high on her pedestal, is above it all. 

We only need to read the news to see who placed her there.

© Marilyn Braun 2013

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Royal Review: Dress Up Kate

Since Kate's engagement announcement dozens of websites and blogs have have popped up ready to dissect every detail about her fashion choices. Frustratingly, your only option was to pass judgement in the various comments sections. Until now. Finally a sticker book has come along called  Dress Up Kate, allowing you to take matters into your own hands and play stylist to Kate. 

Poker faced minion

From her wedding day, to her honeymoon, royal engagements, Jubilee parties and red-carpet events you can choose from a variety of sedate outfits and accessories to match the occasion or throw caution to the wind. Corgi bedroom slippers to Garden parties? Wedding dress to a Lifeboat launch? Use your imagination!

Is that a telephoto lens
in the distance?

Replete with poker faced minions who appear to view Kate's state of undress as a matter of course, the only thing missing from these stickers are the paparazzi and chastened magazine editors. Although in light of recent news, Catherine may appear *ahem* a tad overdressed for the 'Home Alone' pages, no?

Look but don't play with it. One day
 this will be a collectors item.

Certain to appeal to all age groups, including my eight year old daughter, who would have had far more fun had I let her play with the stickers. With Dress Up Kate, 'Copy-Kate's' no longer have an excuse to continue venting their frustrations about her fashion choices. With 350 stickers, you can indulge your fashion fantasies to your heart's content. Don't like her shoes? Choose new ones! Floral bouquet clashes with the Queen's hat? Change it! The choice is now yours.

© Marilyn Braun 2012

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Catherine Cambridge, a 30th birthday reality check

Dear Catherine/Your Royal Highness/Ma'am/Kate,

I would like to join the other voices in wishing you a very happy 30th birthday today. According to some reports you are having a quiet celebration of this milestone event. While clearing away the decorations and left-over cake, perhaps you could take a moment to reflect on what you really want to accomplish in the years ahead.

True enough, to a degree, the future is all mapped out for you. You will (eventually) produce the obligatory heir and spare. We will see you at all of the major events - Trooping the Color, Garter ceremony, funerals, etc. Where you will stun the crowds while inadvertently distracting from the more sombre moments. It's probably the last thing you want but we just can't help ourselves.

People have pointed out the differences between you and your late mother-in-law, Diana. How you are smarter, savvier, older and wiser than she was. Supposedly because of this you will avoid the perils. I disagree. Like her you are on the same path of becoming the ultimate stylish royal barbie doll. Hitting all of the right fashion notes but nothing more. You've barely spoken in public and you're nice to look at. With the fixed smile, all that's missing is the plastic horse drawn pink carriage.

You recently announced four patronages. It's a good start, though there are some who think you've played it too safe with your choices. Nonsense. Sheesh, even Diana waited 6 years before she shook an AIDS patients hand! Give it a few years and you will be brokering world peace while looking fabulous. All in good time.

It's been a dizzying year for you. What with the wedding, the plaudits and automatic position on all of the 'Best of 2011' lists. The pedestal has a nice view, doesn't it? But take a look back at royal history. What comes up, will come down eventually. You may have the support of your husband and the royal system taking it easy with you, but don't think you're immune. You can only ride the wave of the royal wedding for so long. No beautiful dress will save you from the fickle public.

So it's up to you to decide where you go from here. Do you hide out in Anglesy and deny reality? Will  you continue to be fashion plate Barbie? Or do you choose the more challenging route where you're an asset to the royal family based on the work you do and what you accomplish?

Decide who you want to be, before we decide for you.

© Marilyn Braun 2012

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

The Royal Report for Sunday October 23, 2011 - Royal Baby Watch - October edition

On this episode, tips on making a royal baby. Why does Prince Philip have a twinkle in his eye? Can a book about Diana's death be plausible? Find out on this episode:

The Royal Report - Royal Baby Watch - October edition

Publications mentioned

Hello! Canada Weekly No 235 24 October 2011

Chatelaine November 2011 issue - Cover story: Kate Middleton - What's next for the most talked about woman of 2011

From My Royal Collection

Princess Diana - The Day She Didn't Die

Tune in to the next episode of The Royal Report on Sunday October 30, 2011 at 9:00PM ET (North America)

The topic will be: The Royal Family in Scotland

© Marilyn Braun 2011

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Kate Middleton and Catherine who?

Exhibit A

It was inevitable and understandable. Hanging on to the past is reassuring and familiar. There could also be disbelief that the royal wedding actually occurred. Rest assured it did and there's plenty of proof when it doubt. You might actually have to pinch yourself but it's time to face reality. William and Kate Middleton are married and now she is Catherine, The Duchess of Cambridge. It's on DVDs, books and china. There's even official photographs. I present Exhibit A.

Exhibit B

Despite the wedding ceremony and official announcements there are still numerous articles referring to Catherine as Kate Middleton. In rare occurrences she is called The Duchess of Cambridge, like when she unveils a plaque (Exhibit B). But for the media it seems they just don't get it. Some reporters, unsure of what to do, have inventively created a hybrid 'Katy Cambridge'. It's as if they want to acknowledge reality but don't want to let go of the past.

In the beginning, we may have thought that this misconception would be temporary. It would take time for people to adapt. But six months later, people are still using her old name. No matter how many new fashions Catherine wears, she is still referred to as Kate Middleton. She can wear shiny pantyhose to her hearts content but it doesn't change a thing. The  name Kate Middleton is so deeply ingrained that there seems to be no other possibility. It's as if Catherine is just not good enough. It's always 'Kate Middleton, Kate Middleton, Kate Middleton.'

It's an unfortunate occurrence that Catherine would feel neglected. Eclipsed by a more familiar counterpart, possibly at risk of developing an inferiority complex. She needs to repeat the mantra: 'Catherine, you're good enough, you're smart enough, and doggone-it, people will clue in eventually.'

It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when.

© Marilyn Braun 2011

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Has Catherine's privacy become a royal paradox?

It's always nice to see Catherine, isn't it? Especially as it's so rare to do so. What with her wanting to take her time and ease into royal duties. We can't be blamed for taking what we can get in between.

Catherine reportedly spent 4 hours at the salon. How do we know she was there? Because there's a photo of her getting her hair blow dried. This photo was taken through a window. Whose fault is it that she was photographed? The paparazzi who took the picture? Or is it Catherine's for not sitting in a more private location?

Judging by the comments people like seeing her. But yet there are also comments invoking Diana.  Her life is a parable for what can go wrong. But pointing this out is a downer. Like playing outside and being reminded you have homework. It spoils the fun. Off duty photos are harmless, aren't they? Besides, what are the chances it could happen again?

As you read this article there's no need to comment on the hypocrisy. I know I am not innocent of wanting to know about Catherine.  Nor about using her as material for my blogs. I follow her because she is, currently, the most interesting member of the royal family. A royal superstar. Therefore I can't take the high road. Because then it wouldn't allow me to question what's wrong with it.

However I'm also not alone in my interest. But where do you draw the line? The bedroom? Bathroom?Is she supposed to stay in her remote cottage/palace and become a recluse? She may have signed up for a life in the spotlight, but when did saying 'Catherine's privacy' become incongruous? 

I'm drawing my line in the sand at photographs taken through windows or when she's off duty.

Where do you draw yours?

© Marilyn Braun 2011

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Why training Catherine to be Royal is a bad idea

Now that Catherine has been a member of the Royal family for close to five months, the real work is set to begin.

After all, there's more to her role than hitting all the right fashion notes and getting pregnant on demand. The signs are reassuring. Since April the new Duchess of Cambridge has shown promise. She's already perfected the royal wave and the ability to smile on cue. Not to mention she has received training fending off kidnappers when her security detail isn't paying attention. Having passed all of this, she has now progressed to the next level.

Catherine will now be trained on the business side of being royal: private tutorials on government, briefings of State, and learning about organizations such as the arts and media. These private lessons are being held in St. James's Palace. This indoctrination process is expected to take several months, by which point she may regret having said "I Will".

Obviously the learning curve is steep and it will take time. Given her future ornamental role as consort there are all types of diplomatic minefields lying in wait. Fashion faux pas waiting to happen such as wearing the national flag colors of France while visiting the Netherlands.

You'll notice the training has worked when she stiffens at approaching children, no longer smiles spontaneously, and appears impervious to sub-zero temperatures. Will she take fashion risks? Highly unlikely. When all is said and done, Catherine may become a brunette version of Sophie, the Countess of Wessex. Pretty, but staid and unremarkable.

Lessons may have been learnt from the past, but if Catherine is trained to be Royal, the very qualities that people are charmed by and find refreshing are likely to be drummed out of her. Catherine may be accessible now, but the Royal family has their own rules when it comes to their subjects. Rule number one: Do not act like one of them.

So the next time you see Catherine in public acting natural and spontaneous?

Enjoy it while it lasts.

© Marilyn Braun 2011

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

The Royal Report for Sunday September 18, 2011 - Royal Baby Watch - September edition

Tune in to the next episode of The Royal Report on Sunday September 18, 2011 at 9:00PM EST (North America)

The topic will be: Five months in and still no news of a royal baby for William and Catherine. Should they be pregnant by now or are we being impatient?

© Marilyn Braun 2011

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

5 Reasons I don't want to be like Kate Middleton

On April 29th, Catherine Middleton walked into Westminster Abbey a commoner and left HRH The Duchess of Cambridge. Thus fulfilling the collective dreams of women waiting to find their own prince. Not to mention all of the impatient little girls who dragged their parents to the Disney store for instant gratification.

Yes, the royal wedding was a glorious, long overdue event. But now that it's over, reality has set in. This author seems to be under the impression that because she is thin and dresses well we all want to be like Kate Middleton. Granted it would be nice to have hospitals named after you, the adulation of the crowds and an unlimited supply of flower bouquets, for the most part I don't envy Kate in the slightest and I don't want to be like her. Here are my five reasons why.

1) No one gets your name right

Her name is Catherine. It was on the wedding programme and it's probably on her birth certificate. Despite this the media seems to want to hang on to the past. Imagine a world where you are called the wrong name for the rest of your life. Irritating, no? On the bright side, in the event of a divorce, no need to tell people your 'new' name because they never stopped using it in the first place. See? There's always a silver lining.

2) People suddenly have a vested interest in your sex life

Royal babies do not magically appear in official photographs. They must come from somewhere, somehow. Sure we crouch the concept in euphemisms such as 'pregnancy', 'expecting', 'bump' but royal babies must be conceived first. And how to we conceive babies? That's right, we have sex. Now if the thought of thousands of people waiting for you to have sex isn't a buzz killer then I don't know what is.

3) Every part of your appearance is scrutinized in minute detail

We all have bad days where no amount of concealer or Spanx makes a difference. Now imagine being Kate. She cannot leave the palace without looking 100% perfect. Even if she thinks she looks perfect she will inadvertently disappoint hundreds of people without even realizing it. People who take her apart for everything: her hair, skin, teeth, weight, shoes, etc. Everything is fair game. Not to mention being photographed from every conceivable angle. For. The. Rest. Of. Your. Life. I don't know about you, but I could not handle that level of scrutiny.

4) You can't eat

Why? See reason #3.

5) Being a trend-setter is hard work

It must be difficult constantly trying to top yourself. Where every decision you make, from the cornflakes you buy to the sushi you eat, is worth emulating. Must be stressful trying to live up to those expectations. Sometimes a girl just wants a bag of crisps without the world waiting to take note of it, okay?

© Marilyn Braun 2011

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

The World According to Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge

Forget President Obama or Queen Elizabeth, Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge is the most influential person on the planet.

Don't believe me?

No other woman can be said to influence everything from pantyhose to the economy. Her wedding even affected the environment. That's how powerful she is. Is it any accident that after her break-up with William in April 2007 that by July, Venus and Saturn were in conjunction? Coincidence? I think not.

We may think that her impact is limited to frivolous fashion choices. Not so! The Media, Hair & Beauty, Technology, Health Care, Travel and Food industries have all experienced the Kate-effect. Who else could change the landscape of the automotive industry by increasing the value of a 2001 Volkswagen Golf?

Clearly a one woman juggernaut of global influence.

However, not everything she touches turns to gold. Case in point, her royal wedding affected the mating patterns of red grouse. The UK economy also took a hit. As well, invoking the royal wedding couldn't even revive Jerry Seinfeld's career. You win some, you lose some.

Luckily she uses her powers for good; raising awareness about affordable flights between Edinburgh and Manchester. The proper etiquette for returning shopping trolleys. As well as highlighting the dangers of putting a maid of honor in a flattering dress.

Catherine's reach is so powerful it even extends into other galaxies! Maybe UFO's are trying to gain a better understanding of this phenomenon.

When they come to a conclusion let's hope they return so they can explain it to us.

© Marilyn Braun 2011

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

William and Catherine, Come Back!

It's been 11 days since I've seen a photograph of William and Catherine in the news. Once they boarded that British Airways plane with no in-flight entertainment, they were gone.  True they have promised to return to Canada, but when? What on earth are we supposed to do until then? Surely we can't survive on mere pregnancy rumors and eating disorder concerns?

Sure I've read stories about them. The ho-hum Diana comparisons. Kate's old car is for sale on eBay. But no physical sightings. They reportedly went to the movies recently and moved into Kensington Palace. I know they're busy, but couldn't they at least step-out to pick out some paint colors?

If I'd only known that it would be the last time I would see them for a while, I would have appreciated it more. I wouldn't have gotten so frustrated with the incessant coverage about Kate's hair. Now that they're gone all I have is the Maclean's Commemorative Edition - The Royal Tour of Canada Souvenir Issue to remember the good times.

I try to remain stoic but every day is a challenge. Progressing through the stages of royal tour withdrawal, I'm currently at Stage 5 - guilt and regret. If only we'd been more welcoming on Canada Day. Maybe there was too little fiddle music at the concert? Why did they have to leave? Was it something we said? However, all hope is not lost. William did say they would return, didn't he? He promised they would. When in doubt, save a copy of the news footage as evidence.

I guess there's nothing left to do other than to face reality. It's a depressing prospect given the lack of exciting royal news. Maybe in the interim someone will abdicate, an illegitimate child will surface or Prince Charles will demand Camilla become queen.

Fingers crossed.

© Marilyn Braun 2011

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

Day Six - William and Catherine's Royal Tour of Canada - Yellowknife, North West Territories

Source: British Monarchy Flickr

On Day Six of their royal tour, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge arrived in Yellowknife, North West Territories. The last royal visit was in  August 1994, when the Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh visited Yellowknife, Rankin Inlet and Iqaluit. They had previously visited in 1959 and 1970. Prince Charles visited in 1979 and Prince Andrew and  his then wife Sarah Ferguson, came in 1987.


During the official welcoming ceremony at Somba K’e Civic Plaza, the couple were treated to a song of welcome by Native Canadian drummers performed by the Dene, traditional Aboriginal hand games and “high kick,” an Arctic sport. On this stop William made a memorable, brief quadrilingual speech in English and French, adding his thanks in the languages of the Dene and the north coast of Inuvialuit.

Source: British Monarchy Flickr

After watching a brief game of street hockey, William tried his hand but failed at three shoot-out attempts. Catherine, who excelled at sports in school, demurred in participating in a shoot-out and instead dropped the ball in a face-off. She was wearing a wearing a cream linen three-quarter dress by Malene Birger with shoes by L.K. Bennett. They were presented with Canadian Olympic hockey jerseys with CAMBRIDGE on the back, Catherine's sporting the #1 and William with #2.

In the afternoon they joined a Session of Youth Parliament at the Legislative Assembly, learning about the challenges Aboriginal youth face, specifically in keeping young people in school. Later in the day the couple took a 30-minute float plane ride to Blachford Lake. They met members of the Canadian Rangers, the country's volunteer northern home guard. Catherine was named an honorary member of the Rangers. William had previously been named an honorary member, along with his brother Harry, in 2009. The couple posed in Rangers' red sweatshirts for a group photo. William was given a handcrafted patrol knife. Earlier he had received platinum cuff links and Catherine was given a polar bear diamond brooch made from diamonds mined in the territory.

Source: British Monarchy Flickr

The couple then toured the Dechinta Centre for Research and Learning, a program combining traditional Aboriginal learning into a university accredited program. Here they learned about  moose-hide tanning and fish-drying.

At the end of the day, an elder guided them by canoe to uninhabited Eagle Island on Blachford Lake, where they dined on a specially prepared meal of local cranberries, Bannock bread, caribou and white fish. No doubt enjoying a peaceful, brief respite from the whirlwind tour.

Sources: Indian Country, CBC, Newstabulous

© Marilyn Braun 2011 Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.

The Royal Report for July 10, 2011 - The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge in Canada

Did Catherine really wear the same jeans three days in a row? Has the Toronto Sun gone too far with a picture of Catherine? What happens when the fashion police show up?

Find out on this episode:

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge in Canada

Publications discussed and mentioned

The Toronto Star cover story - Cheeky Kate - July 9, 2011

Hello! Canada Weekly No 222 27 June 2011

Hello! Canada Weekly No 223 11 July 2011

Hello! Royal Special Commemorative Edition - William & Catherine's tour of Canada

Maclean's Magazine - Special Commemorative Edition - The Royal Tour

Blogs and links mentioned

World of Royalty Blog

Prince William's Final Speech in Canada

From My Royal Collection

Charles and Diana Visit Canada

Tune in to the next episode of The Royal Report on Sunday July 17, 2011 at 9:00PM ET (North America)

The topic will be: Is Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge a style icon?

© Marilyn Braun 2011

Thank you for enjoying this article. If you use the information for research purposes, a link to credit the work I've put into writing it would be appreciated.