Tuesday, August 28, 2007

The sad day Camilla pandered to you

I'm mad.

I don't remember the last time I was this disappointed. I've just found out that Camilla is not attending the Diana Memorial service on Friday. And I just want to say to all of the people who were against her attending.

Are YOU happy now?

This is an article from CNN. According to Clarence House, Camilla has decided not to attend because it 'could divert attention from the purpose of the occasion'.
But who was accusing her of doing so? Princes William and Harry wanted Camilla to attend, they invited her. Shouldn't that have been good enough? No, obviously it wasn't. If William and Harry can live in the present, forgive Camilla and their father, why can't we?

Maybe you feel that you're defending Diana's memory. By your complaints, you actually did the opposite. In all the time spent making this a controversial issue, you ignored Diana's memory completely. Was it ever about that for you? Or was it just an excuse to channel your negativity?

I don't know who I'm more disappointed in. You or Camilla. She pandered to you. Gave in to your tantrum. Now what are you going to do? Are you going to remember Diana or are you going to savour your victory? Probably the latter. To quote one reveller, and hard-core Diana fan: "I couldn't be happier if I’d won the lottery." Enough said.

Camilla should have gone. There, I've said it. I don't live in the past. If Camilla wanted to honor Diana's memory, she was perfectly entitled to do so. Especially when Princes William and Harry personally invited her. That's what should have been important. Or are you forgetting that? Diana was their mother. They're planning the service. Not YOU.

But articles have called William and Harry naive. They can't possibly understand the problems Camilla caused their mother. That they had only invited Camilla, according to James Whittaker, because "she is the wife of their father, whom they adore." But who is blaming them for their lack of judgement in this matter? YOU are. Diana would be thrilled.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion. Okay, people didn't want her to go. Fair enough. But who ultimately threatened to make this about something other than Diana?

YOU did.

I hope you're proud of yourselves.

© Marilyn Braun 2007


Anonymous said...

Marilyn I absolutely agree with you, Camilla should have gone. But I must be frank, I had the feeling that she wouldn't go. It's crazy to see how the public is caring on a grudge that Diana got rid of during the last period of her life. Diana & Charles decided to leave the past behind and make a better life for their children. That is what they did. Now that Diana is gone to a better place where there is no sorrow and pain, we on the other hand are left on this earth where sorrow and pain reigns. People still reflect on the breakdown of The Prince & Princess of Wales marriage and they still blame her (Camilla), even though we should follow in William & Harry's example and leave the past behind. Some are say that Diana would be proud that Camilla won't be there but I know that her spirit is very disappointed.

amelia said...

I agree completely, I couldn't have said it better!

Unfortunately those people that should read it....won't!!!!

Anonymous said...

You know when I think about this tenth annversary, I go on Youtube and listen to this song that singer Myrna Summers sung at a famous ministers memorial service. The song is called "Uncloudy Day" and I just think that is the perfect song for Diana. I know that the Royal family is not that into black spiritual gospel but I know if they heard this, it would truly get them on their feet. Here is the link so you all can hear and watch this great performance. it.
I hope you will enjoy it as much as I did.

MandysRoyalty said...

There was so much venom aimed at Camilla over the years. She was even given the nickname of Rottweiler. Although her stepsons invited her, there is no changing the history of how Camilla was viewed by Diana or the public. This withdrawal is a delicate way of avoiding public awkwardness, in my opinion.

Then again, some people have stated (such as claudius) that Diana was more accepting of Camilla at the end of her life. That attending the memorial is not a big deal. Diana had her new love with Dodi, had grown older and wiser by the age of 36, and had possibly moved on anyway. Would she mind Camilla if she were still alive today? My guess is, probably not.

Seeing Camilla at something that was supposed to focus solely on Diana, though? Diana probably would've had a small issue with that. No scene stealers need apply! But, again, this is just my opinion.

Feel free to email me whenever you want.

Anonymous said...

IMO the DoC has proven to be a good partner for the POW. I like her on one level and she makes me cringe on another. The whole long-term adultery thing just..

Anyway, I think it is best that she not go. Given the history there I don't feel that it is appropriate. We can argue about forgiveness etc but some things just don't seem decent. I know I may be in the minority on this site but I think this is best.

If this was a private service I don't think it would have raised such ire in the public but, that family does represent more than just themselves. That line between private and public is really blurry. I think that they must listen to public opinion to survive and sometimes make concessions.

For the POW and DOC this must be awful but I think many feel it is poetic justice. Their history will always effect their future and if the DOC feels like there is a third person effecting the state of her marriage or the way the public percieves her then... you know what they say about Karma

Anonymous said...

Well said. I can only imagine how difficult this was for Camilla, and for Charles too.

Would Diana really have wanted her memory used against them in this mean-spirited way? I don't know, but I don't think the anti-Camilla people are doing Diana's image any favors with this pointless hate campaign. It only encourages the anti-Diana people to continue with their mud-slinging, too.

Maybe for some people this endless fight is the real point and it's not about Diana (or Camilla) at all anymore.

Anonymous said...

Can't you understand that for any family in this situation, regardless of the players, basic etiquette would prescribe the children invite their parent's spouse, and basic etiquette would prescribe, as Camilla wanted to do, that she would thank them and decline?

The memorial is about Diana, for *her* loved ones and friends. *Anyone's* memorial service is for loved ones and friends. Regardless of that person's flaws or rights or wrongs, their loved ones and friends loved *them*. They cannot be forced to love someone who wasn't a friend or loved one.

Many who may accept Camilla as Charles' second wife and have happily moved on would see it wasn't right for Camilla to be at this service.

If Diana had died, and *then* Camilla had come on the scene, different story. No one would object to a second wife who'd had no 'history' with the first one, though they might wonder what she was doing there if she hadn't known Diana - but be more likely to accept her as supporting her stepsons.

I cannot imagine anyone in my circle of friends committing such a faux pas. I know how my husband would feel, eg, about a vicious first wife who set out to estrange his children being present at *his* memorial service!

Camilla got it right, Charles got it wrong.

Worse, I think he put Camilla in the untenable position of choosing between personal loyalty to him, and loyalty to Queen and country, since the Queen also knew the right thing to do, but was overruled by Charles.

MandysRoyalty said...

Well said, lou!

Marilyn Braun said...


This is precisely what I'm referring to in the article. You say that the memorial is about Diana, but yet your comment is exclusively focused on Camilla, what she did wrong, and what 'you' feel is appropriate. This has nothing to do with etiquette, faux pas, Prince Charles, Queen and country, or what you feel is right. This is what Prince William and Prince Harry want, and if you're going to try to find excuse for their decision, then you're completely missing the point of the entire occasion. Even if you don't agree with their decision to invite her, can't you at least respect theirs?

Anonymous said...

Hi Marilyn - I thought I made it clear that I *would* expect the princes to invite Camilla - and equally expect her to thank them and decline.

I don't think we do know that they *wanted* her there. We are told she wanted to do what was the right thing and decline, and honour would have been satisfied all round. But we are also told that it was Prince Charles who *wanted* her there; we have not had, yet, confirmation that it was *their* wish from the princes themselves, or expressions of regret from them that she will not attend.

If it's true that they *wanted* Camilla present, then of course it's their decision - but I would still expect Camilla to decline. I am a stepmother too, of several decades, as well as a mother, and if my stepchildren invited me to a funeral or memorial service for their mother, I would decline even if they wanted me there - and much as I believe they really like me. I would not be able to share their grief or even their happier memories, and I don't think it would be fair to them or their mother's friends to be present with such ambiguous feelings: empathy for them, little for their mother.