Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Wanted: Royal Bride

Job Type: Permanent/Full time (after indeterminate probation period)
Location: Clarence House, London, UK
Job Category: Executive
Industry: World Rulers
Company Name: Windsor Inc.
Company URL: www.royal.gov.uk
Experience: None
Number Of Positions: 1
Position Start Date: TBD

The Opportunity

Do you have what it takes to be a future Queen? Are you looking for an opportunity for advancement? If so, an opening has just come up in Windsor Inc. Direct Line division for a Royal Bride.

The British Royal Family has a long history and is one of most well known royal families in the world. The Firm is looking for a Royal Bride to expand operations and provide top level support. Reporting to the Sovereign, the successful incumbent will be a self-starter, and capable of hitting the ground running. Serving the country, you will provide good value while liaising with all levels of society.

An amazing opportunity to take your place in history!

Qualifications

As the wife of the second-in-line to the throne, you should have the following qualifications:

  • Ability to give and receive undue deference

    • Good judgement and discretion

    • Patience and the ability to look the other way

    • Keen interest in people and the ability to make small talk

    • Sensitivity to all cultures

    • Strong fashion sense.

    • Physical attractiveness is a definite plus

      • Must like flowers

        • Capable of operating scissors when opening hospitals, cutting ribbons.

        • Must be able to review troops and sit for endless portraits

        • Ability to ride a horse is an asset.

        • Demonstrated skills in speech making and dealing with the media

        • Comfortable in a high profile role

        • Willingness to travel and a familiarity with the various global divisions

        • Advanced Word, Excel, Powerpoint, Outlook skills.

        • Able to prioritize and multi-task

        • Adaptable to changing duties

        • Ability to work effectively in a fast paced and occasionally unpredictable environment.

          Benefits

          Dental, eyeglasses, vast properties, priceless jewels, generous fashion stipend. Travel to exotic locations.

          If this opportunity interests you please contact Trixie at trixie@royalrecruiting.com

          We thank you for your interest. Due to the large volume of applicants, only those qualified for the position will be contacted.

          © Marilyn Braun 2007

        3 comments:

        Anonymous said...

        What a fabulous post, Marilyn, I love it! Great to get a refreshing output on the supposed breakup. Keep up the good work!

        Marilyn Braun said...

        Thanks very much, I'm glad you enjoyed it! :D

        Anonymous said...

        Under "Qualifications" you might want to add "working ovaries and uterus."