Wednesday, June 03, 2009

Survivor Balmoral - Day 35

Trapped in their home for 39 days with no servants to wait on them, no private secretaries as go between, the royals must communicate directly with each other and make their own beds. Through a series of challenges, each contestant will prove that they are the real Royal Survivor.

On the last episode of Survivor Balmoral, Paul Burrell, the only one who knew how to cook and entertain royally, unexpectedly left the tribe. Chaos ensued as the tribe members, hungrily eyed each other. On this episode the remaining members of tribe Saxe Coburg Gotha sit satiated around the campfire. The Queen approaches the group and they all stand up.

The Queen: Have you seen the corgi's?

The other tribe members look around innocently. Edward stops knawing on a bone. Charles dabs his mouth with a napkin.

Edward: Mummy, would you like a rib?

The Queen: Where's Andrew and Anne?

Charles: I guess they just couldn't handle it. Survival of the fittest Mummy.

Anne enters carrying some more firewood

Anne: Must I do all of the work around here?

The Queen: Well, if you see Andrew please let him know that I was looking for him. I need some help with my Wii.

Meanwhile, during the dessert making challenge, Prince William is trying to plan a small birthday party for his grandfather, Prince Philip who will be 88 soon. He is currently in the carpenters shed and looks for some supplies to make a birthday cake. He finds some sawdust and what appears to be a stale bag of marshmallows and fashions a crude mound. Proud of himself he heads towards the door, which he has cleverly wedged open with an open crate containing a box of cake mix, a carton of eggs, bottled water and two cake pans. Prince Philip and the Queen wait to taste-test. William puts the cake down infront of them. The Queen looks at it warily.

Prince William (Proudly): I made it myself!

Prince Philip: It's...very interesting...what does it have in it?

Prince William: Marshmallows!

The Queen (whispering to Philip): We don't have any marshmallows.

In another part of the castle Prince Charles and Princess Anne are busy with the IKEA challenge. They must put together a rectangular plastic coffee table with 4 screw-in legs. Charles reads the instructions.

Charles: (Amazed) It says you don't need any tools for this.

Anne: That sounds too easy. Why would they give us something that easy? Are they trying to trick us?

Both look apprehensively at the 5 pieces.

Charles (looks around desperately) Help!!

Later on, at tribal council, the Queen gathers the remaining members of the tribe. She looks around and mentally does a headcount.

The Queen: Has anyone seen Andrew?

Charles and Edward look nervously at each other. Just then, the missing corgi appears.

The Queen (delighted): Oh there's my lost corgi!

On the next episode of Survivor Balmoral, the Queen searches for Prince Andrew while the remaining tribe members help put the coffee table together.

© Marilyn Braun 2009

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