Where's my invitation?

Ever since the announcement in February that Charles and Camilla are getting married I have been eagerly making my own plans to celebrate the event. Whatever happened in the past is in the past and no one could be happier than myself at their upcoming wedding. I'm embarassed to admit that I don't remember his first wedding in 1981 and I confess that my first recollection is of vague incomprehension at what all of the fuss was all about. I chaulk this up to the fact that I was nine years old and probably had more interest in playing with my barbies instead of the celebration.

Now, 24 years later I'm geared up and ready to make amends. However, imagine my shock at not receiving an invitation to these nuptuals. Here I have been religiously checking the mail, trying to locate the perfect gift at Walmart, and debating what I will wear. This obviously doesn't seem to matter. I never took Charles (Chuck to me) to be the vindictive sort and I planned on getting him a nice gift to make up for all of it. The right gift is crucial, you can never underestimate the value of a good bbq set. Unfortunately the royal couple have not advertised where they are registered so this makes my quest just that much more difficult - way to go Fred and Glady's! I've never understood these pet names for each other and to be honest I don't use them myself. Diana labelled Camilla the "rotweiller" but I think that's unfair. Personally I've always thought she looked more like a British bulldog or if I'm having a good day, a pug, but the consensus seems that she resembles a rotweiller. Who am I to challenge public opinion?

I don't like to brag about my ties to Charles but we're practically related. I'm related through his tenth cousin five times removed through his German cousins, (who live in England and only write occasionally), one of whom has a friend who has a brother who has a nephew who married the woman who read his authorized biography and lent it to me. I read it a while ago and he didn't bother to mention me. My ego took a knocking with that; however he was polite enough not to air the dirty laundry I do have. The closest mention were some tapes which I have yet to receive some sort of payment for, commonly known as 'Camillagate'. Oh how the extended family laughed and laughed! Although I haven't always seen eye to eye with his behavior, I've maintained a dignified silence to his face. I've always defined family as people you have to tolerate because you want to remain in their wills. You share the good times and gossip at the bad times. I personally believe that Charles was always too big for his britches. Just because you're a prince doesn't mean you have to be a snob, that's what I always want to say. But I do have a bit of a soft spot for him, doesn't he have such a dreamy smile? Sorry that's an inside my head thought..they do occasionally pop out at the most embarrasing moments.

I do admit that I didn't invite him to my wedding, but that's only because I didn't want my event overshadowed by his presence and the handful of media that would come with him. Where would I seat them? An open bar get's expensive you know. I also didn't want to have to rent more chairs; the supplier was nice enough to give me a discount on the one's I did get and I was't about to push my luck. If the lack of invitation is because of this deliberate oversight then that's completely petty.

I've heard that he wants to keep this wedding as low key as possible; apparently only thirty people are invited. One would think that since his mum and dad aren't coming that there would now be some sort of space for me. I don't even mind sitting in the back. Hmmph! maybe I'll just keep that bbq set for myself.

© Marilyn Braun 2005