Thursday, March 17, 2005

Family in crisis....on the next Dr. Phil

Dr. Phil: On today's program we have a couple who are getting married next month and their plans are beset with all sorts of problems. On top of that, his mother puts her job before parenthood and neither parent is going to the wedding. I'd like you to meet Chuck, his fiancee Milla and his parents Liz and Phil. Welcome to the show. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding.

Chuck: Thank you
Dr. Phil: It's my understanding that both of you have been married before, is that correct?
Milla: Yes
Dr. Phil: (to Liz and Phil) and neither of you are coming to the wedding
Liz: That's correct
Dr Phil: (looking at his cards): it says here that you put your job above parenthood, what is it that you do?
Liz: I'm the Queen of England, Head of the Commonwealth, Defender of the Faith
Dr. Phil: You're a multi-tasker aren't you?
Liz: Quite
Dr. Phil (to Phil): what do you think of all of this?
Phil: I don't like the long hours that Liz works, sometimes I just wish that she would take some time off..we had such a good time before she took over the 'top job'.
Dr. Phil: How do you feel about your son's wedding?
Liz: Well, as a mother you want your children to be happy...
Phil: that bloody boy of ours just mucked things up...he could have had a good marriage...we all liked his first wife...and then he ran off with...her..(points to Milla)
Dr. Phil (to Chuck): you had an affair while you were married?
Chuck: yes, once it was clear that my marriage had irretrivably broken down...
Phil: Oh stop making excuses!...you're always making excuses...admit it..you mucked up!
Chuck: ..I wasn't a perfect husband..I agree...
Dr. Phil (to Milla): how do you feel about all of this?
Milla: well, it hasn't been easy for us...we've loved each other for over thirty years...I'm disappointed that his parent's aren't coming to the wedding...I really wish that they would reconsider.
Chuck: We want to have a small wedding and my parents say that they're happy for us...but I don't believe it..
Liz: Chuck, you know that's not true...but, with my job, think of how it would look..
Dr. Phil: This is your son, why are you concerned with how it would look?
Liz: As Defender of the Faith...as Sovereign..as Head of the Church of England...I can't be seen to be condoning this marriage, no matter how I feel about it personally...it conflicts with my job..
Chuck: Oh mummy! You've always put your job above us children.
Liz (to Chuck): one day you'll understand the amount of responsibility, the sacrifices I made. I didn't want to but I had no choice, there is no break in the job that I have....there's no retirement..no kicking back and relaxing...
Dr. Phil (to Liz): No retirement?
Liz: No...I made an oath to do this job until I die..I can't go back on that promise
Dr Phil: Your dedication is admirable..
Liz (pulling out a kleenex): if I didn't have a tipple..I think I would go mad..
Milla (under her breath): sometimes more than a tipple
Liz (to Milla): what did you say?.....what did you say?...If you think this is a joke then I'm not amused! I understand why Diana called you a rotweiller..the only reason we're allowing you to marry is because Chuck won't give you up..non-negotiable he calls his relationship with you!...
Milla (to Liz): why can't you just be happy for us?...would it kill you to smile once in a while?
Dr. Phil (to Chuck): Your plans have been beset with all sorts of problems..is that correct?
Chuck: Yes, we've had to downgrade to the town hall..
Dr. Phil: Does it really matter where you guys marry?...isn't the marriage more important than the where?..
Milla (to Chuck): I would go to the ends of the earth for you..
Chuck (to Milla): if I could only live in your trousers...
Dr. Phil: Ok...I think we need to take a break...back in a moment.

© Marilyn Braun 2005

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